Monday, September 25, 2006

Go to Hell, Notre Dame!

Let me just say it straight out: I hate Notre Dame football. I hate the mythology and supposed mystique. I hate its privileged positioning -- its NBC contract, its status as automatic-BCS team if they just get themselves artificially inflated into the rankings. I hate its academic pretenses (Notre Dame is a good school; by listening to its supporters you would think it was the only school in Division I with academic standards -- Stanford says hello, and wants to pass its regards along to Tony Rice as well.). I hate that it thinks it is the only Catholic university with a sports pedigree in the country (BC too says hello and wonders how Notre Dame basketball is and if anyone has noticed which team has dominated the football series between the two schools lately).


As you might imagine, then, I was very pleased to see Jonathan Chait's TNR online article, Irish Lore, which explores the "mythology of Notre Dame football." (The article originally appeared in the Los Angeles Times.) Chait argues that much of the mythology is based on lies and half truths. Again, no one can deny Notre Dame its place in college football history, but one would think that there would be no need to overinflate that greatness.


When I am king of the world, and someday it will happen, one of my first pronouncements will be that Notre Dame, and all other independents, must join a conference. If they do not want to do so, fine, but they also will not be eligible for the 16-team postseason tournament that I will also mandate. Everyone likes to discuss how Notre Dame always schedules such tough opponents, but they do so only because they are not in a conference that forces them to play a slate of teams that may not always be great, but that is always tough by the histoey and rivalry inherent in conference play. Ohio State may also be a loathsome agglomeration, but at least the football program doesn't get to pick and choose whether or when to play Wisconsin. Year-in and year-out, the conference schedule in the Big Ten, or SEC, or even the Pac-10, Big 12 or the ACC with its recent changes is more grueling than Notre Dame's schedule irrespective of the aggregate record of opponents by the very nature of conference play.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Here's one of the biggest pissers of the whole situation: NBC (the Notredame Broadcasting Corporation) and ABC and ESPN will all continue to grant the Irish their fantastic TV deal for as long as (and precisely because) so many of us simply hate Notre Dame. I, for one, tune in to their games regularly in the hope that they'll lose.

You've got, then, three distinct groups tuning in to any given ND game. First, you've got God's chosen tribe, the actual ND fans. Second, you've got the fans of the other, lesser, team that ND has deigned to play that weekend. Third, you've got all of the people (like me) who are hoping for a beatdown like they had against Michigan (and against Michigan State in the first half).

What possible reason is there for TV broadcasters to treat them any differently?

Anonymous said...

Because they are Notre Dame, goddamnit. That's why.

And Dcat.... doctor, heal thyself!

dcat said...

Bingo! My solution of forcing them into a conference will automatically (albeit eventually) dispel that contract, because then they will be under a conference contract. The recruiting advantage NBC gives ND alone ought to make the NCAA give pause. At minimum, the NCAA ought not to have caved into giving Notre Dame automatic status in the BCS.

dcat

dcat said...

Some Catholic --
Clearly God prefers BC. (And during basketball season he or she tends to prefer BC, Marquette, Depaul, St. Johns . . .)
dcat

Anonymous said...

Some Catholic -

By 'differently,' I meant differently than the way they're treated now, not differently from the rest of the teams in college football.

Thunderstick said...

If God is indeed real and Catholicism is the one true religion (which as a Catholic I am 100% certain it is--hope the rest of you have fun burning for eternity in hell), one need look no further than the 1993 ND/BC game to see which school God favors.

dcat said...

Amen.
That stands as one of my favorite games of all time, and the beginning of a long stretch of dominance for the Jesuits of BC over the Golden Domers.

dcat

dcat said...

Yup -- I totally left out Georgetown in my list of basketball schools.

dcat